


Alex, What Happened?

by Rogueangelll



Category: 18th Century CE RPF, Alexander Hamilton - Ron Chernow, American Revolution RPF, Hamilton - Miranda, Historical RPF
Genre: Alex has some baggage, And then angsty but it ended happy I swear, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dirty Talk, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Smut, Hamilton deserves better, It started fluffy, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Modern Era, One Shot, PWP without Porn, Porn with Feelings, Some Humor, Some Plot, Then it got smutty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-10
Updated: 2018-10-10
Packaged: 2019-07-28 20:58:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16249676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rogueangelll/pseuds/Rogueangelll
Summary: A pure, happy boyfriends thing turns less pure and then John messes up a bit.





	Alex, What Happened?

Hamilton ran his fingers through his messy hair and sighed, staring at himself in the mirror. His rosy skin was plated with light bags under his eyes, though his sleep over the past couple of days hasn't been that bad. In fact, it was the best in a long time. He was feeling happy and confident and for once, _not_ extremely busy. So, he resolved to invite his boyfriend over.

After texting Laurens, (Laurens knowing full and well that it was most likely a booty call) Hamilton showered as quickly as humanly possible, brushed his hair, and tied it up in a loose bun. He brushed his teeth and pulled on some clean clothes, although they were consciously chosen so he wouldn't appear too dressy for a Friday night in. For five minutes or so he straightened up his small studio apartment, making sure to pick up all the trash especially and straighten up the mess of books all over his desk and the floor by his bed. When a knock came upon his door, he was just finishing up making his bed.  Or, rather, the sorry excuse for a full-sized mattress that sat on his floor.

Hamilton bit his lip in anticipation and opened the door for Laurens, who was holding up a small-ish gift bag. "Hey, John," he said slowly, motioning him into the apartment and closing the door behind him. Laurens leaned forward and kissed him; he handed the bag to him in the process. He pulled away as he locked the door. "...What's this?"

"Nothing, I just," Laurens laughed a little and began to shrug off his leather jacket, "walked by this store and they had that in the window, and it totally reminded me of you so I had to get it."

Hamilton reached in and pulled the paper out, holding it aside as he pulled out the gift itself. His eyes widened slightly and Laurens smiled nervously in anticipation for how his boyfriend would like the gift. "You got me a mug warmer," Hamilton said in disbelief. He pulled out the second, slightly heavier object that was wrapped in bubble wrap. It was a huge mug, that read, _"I read past my bedtime"_ on it; could practically be used as a bowl, should he desire.

"You like it?" Laurens asked excitedly. "I know you've been wanting one of those—the mug warmers—for forever I guess and I saw it next to the mug in the window and I had to get it. I'd have a really guilty conscious if I didn't get it and was left the rest of my life knowing that I didn't get it for you. And the mug, it's pretty big, so you can fit a lot of coffee in there. Not that I'm condoning your poor sleeping habits."

Hamilton smiled and set the gift aside.  He swayed forward and wrapped his arms around Laurens' neck. They kissed as Laurens stumbled slightly to support him, hugging his body and kissing back. Hamilton pulled away with a grin.

"...I take it that you liked it?" Laurens sighed lightly, taken off-guard and grinning. Hamilton nodded and kissed him again, slower this time. He was pushed against the wall as his neck was attacked by Laurens' lips and he groped at his back.

"I-I love it," Hamilton mumbled as Laurens began to palm him. "...I wish I had thought of getting you a gift— I mean, this was mostly just a booty call."

Laurens paused his kissing and breathed on Hamilton's neck, "I know..."

"Mmn—" he moaned a bit as Laurens continued, one hand going to comb through his short hair, "...not that I wouldn't wanna just hang out or sum', y'know, but I just really wanna have sex right about now— _fuck_ ," he cut himself off and mumbled into his neck, feeling Laurens' hand move inside the waistband of his jeans.

"Me too," Laurens nuzzled his face up to kiss Hamilton on the neck, the ear, the cheek, and finally the lips. Hamilton kissed back and parted his lips to tease his tongue along Laurens' bottom lip, pushing his body forward to make them walk towards his bed. Hamilton fell back, rather intensely while still embraced with Laurens' lips and arms, onto the mattress. He tried to keep Laurens' lips on his but Laurens pulled away, intent on getting to enjoy the pleasures of making his boyfriend moan while he kissed and sucked in his neck.

"N-not too hard," Hamilton muttered, fingers scratching down his back, "it— it'll leave a mark."

Laurens hummed reassurance, not pulling away. He sucked harder in one spot, causing Hamilton startle and hold onto him harder, his legs rocking just slightly as he wrapped them around Laurens' hips to keep them grounded. Laurens continued to suck until fully satisfied that it would leave a mark. He pulled away and Hamilton slowly opened his eyes, his limp hand going instinctively to touch the spot. His eyes widened as he felt a small bump.

"John!" he yelped, sitting up just slightly when Laurens pushed him back down. Hamilton scolded him and hit his arm, looking up from beneath his boyfriend on the bed. "Now I have a big ass hickey right on my neck! What the hell?"

Laurens smirked proudly and kissed Hamilton lovingly on the cheek. He jerked his face away and glared.

"I literally have a meeting tomorrow," he complained. 

"Do you actually?" Laurens asked, a bit startled.

"...No," he admitted, to which Laurens sighed in relief and kissed him again. Hamilton went on, "but I do have work, and I don't wanna—" he paused and muttered, "God, you asshole. So childish.  I look so trashy."

"You're  _my_ trashy."

"Childish," he repeated.

Laurens smiled endearingly and he just sighed in defeat, wrapping his arms back around Laurens' neck and kissing him.

He mumbled against his lips, "I love you. ...Jerk."

"I love you too," Laurens pulled away and shifted down, his lips pressingly more gently to Hamilton's neck. He tugged his own shirt and Hamilton immediately did the same, being so previously engaged in making out that he completely spaced it. Laurens began to kiss over his bare shoulders, his hand moving back between Hamilton's legs and holding onto him in just the right way.

"...John," Hamilton let out an unintended whimper and immediately brought his fist to his own mouth, embarrassed. He looked away with red cheeks.

"Alex," Laurens hid his devilish smirk. "Don't cover your mouth."

Hamilton cautiously removed his hand, suppressing any further noises and used his hand to make his way into the loop of Laurens' jeans. He tugged at it and smirked, suddenly pushing Laurens away.

"What is it?" Laurens asked, rolling off of him courteously.

"Lube, condom, one sec," Hamilton said quickly, getting off the bed. He was almost to the bathroom when he turned around and smirked, walking backward, "and those pants better be off by the time I'm back.”

Laurens went red and nodded, averting his gaze and smiling to himself.

Hamilton dug through the bathroom drawers, took out a wrapped condom and a mostly-used bottle of lubricant. He glanced up at himself in the mirror, personally admiring his own blue eyes and smiling to himself. He thought of Laurens, and the way his hair was undercut and clean, longer on top and perfect for running his fingers through and grabbing onto. He swallowed and turned out of the bathroom, running right into Laurens.

Laurens grabbed his wrist and kissed him, backed him against the wall again, supporting his trembling knees.  He could feel Hamilton shivering, whether that be from cold or neediness, he didn't know. Hamilton kissed back desperately and coaxed his boyfriend to switch positions so that Laurens was against the wall. Hamilton then dropped the two small items on the floor and, at the same time, dropped to his knees obediently. He ran his hands up Laurens' thighs and put his mouth on his clothed member. Laurens felt a deep moan escape the back of his throat as he tilted his head back. While Hamilton sucked through the fabric at the ever growing and darkening round spot in, he also ran his hands up into Laurens' boxers and over his thighs.

"God," Laurens moaned and clutched his dark hair. "This okay?"

Hamilton took his mouth away and made eye-contact with Laurens. He answered seriously, "Yes, John. _Please_ do."

So, Laurens smirked as he tugged at Hamilton's done-up hair. Hamilton made a soft noise and hurriedly worked off Laurens' boxers, almost immediately going to take his cock in his mouth. Laurens let out a strangled moan at Hamilton's eager attitude, letting his hand slip slightly from his hair. Hamilton pulled off a little, teasing, reminding Laurens to take control and push his head down. Hamilton let out a satisfied moan at this action, promptly sucking and using one hand to move up and down the remainder of his member and over his balls. Meanwhile, his other hand continued to stroke up and down his thigh, just slightly grounding himself.

Laurens worked to take Hamilton's damp hair out of its elastic, his knees feeling weak at the way he looked— mouth on his cock, naked except for boxers with his eyes closed and beautiful lashes casting dark shadows over his pink cheeks. Not to mention the way his auburn hair— though a bit more brown as it was still slightly wet— fell over his creamy, slender shoulders.

"Alexander," Laurens moaned his name, knowing that it was a major turn-on. He jolted suddenly, feeling his cock twitch. "Alex, ah, fuck."

Hamilton was tempted to just let him finish in his mouth but resolved to pull away, Laurens lazily whining and freeing his hand from Hamilton's hair. Hamilton stood, picking up the lube and condom, suddenly being pushed back onto his bed as attacked in desperate— if not frustrated— kisses.

"John," he moaned softly. Laurens tugged off Hamilton's boxers and threw them aside without any thought, taking the items from Hamilton's hand. Hamilton's eyes widened when Laurens applied lube and pushed a finger into him, and he proclaimed slightly louder than intended, "t-this position?" referring to the fact that he was on his back with his legs spread.

Laurens just nodded, breathing heavily and smiling. Hamilton yelped as a second finger was slowly pushed in, spread, and moved. He desperately reached for a pillow to hide his moaning but Laurens stopped him as he pulled his fingers out.

"I want to hear you," he said huskily, unwrapping the condom, "I want you to moan my name as I pound into your tight ass." He pressed a teasing thumb to Hamilton's hole and pulled it away again, just enough to make Hamilton whimper as he applied the lube.

Laurens, on his knees and sitting straight up, slowly pushed into Hamilton. He began to moan and gasped lightly. Hamilton gripped the bed sheets, every delicious whimper and moan falling off of his lips delicately as his knees trembled before Laurens.

"John," he whimpered. "John, yes."

Laurens, caught in the moment, leaned forward and grabbed Hamilton's shoulders. It gave him a better angle to pull out almost all the way, then thrust back into Hamilton as he pulled him back onto his manhood. Hamilton squeaked in surprise and moaned rather loudly, eyes screwed shut.

"Come on, A-Alex, look at me," Laurens cooed, keeping his words as steady as humanly possible, "open those beautiful blue eyes of yours."

So, he opened his eyes best he could, his thick lashes still halfway covering them. Laurens moaned and thrust deeper, prompting a really loud, ascending moan from Hamilton.

Laurens panted, leaning forward and smirking fondly, "Just like that, Lex," he panted. "So perfect. Such a perfect... slut for me."

Hamilton tensed slightly but let it slide, not responding to the comment. Laurens retracted one of his hands from Hamilton's shoulder and brought it to Hamilton's cock instead, pressing his thumb teasingly over his slit as he continued to push into him.

"Ah—! Mm!"

"Mmn— ah, ya like that shit?" he huffed, rubbing harder, "G-good."

" _John."_

"Are you a s-slut for me, baby?"

Hamilton, again, didn't respond, feeling his stomach drop. He just tried to focus on the rhythmic pants and moans from both himself and Laurens, matched with the way Laurens teased his cock and pounded into him.

"Why don't you– mm, say it?"

"Say w-what?" Hamilton breathed, slightly dissociated from his intense attempt at ignoring Laurens' words.

"Say that y-you're mine, my... handsome whore."

Hamilton's eyes widened slightly and he froze, suddenly pushing and scratching at Laurens.  He writhed, words dying on his tongue when he tried to speak them, unsure what to say anyway.  Laurens pulled out, away, startled, and took his hands away as Hamilton got up and ran to the bathroom, not caring that he was naked. Laurens sat in stunned silence alone on the bed.

"Alexander?" he managed to get out, grabbing his boxers that were strewn on the floor. He knocked on the bathroom door. "Are you okay?"

Hamilton didn't respond. Instead, he burst back out of the bathroom and crawled into bed, pulling the covers over his shoulders. Laurens cautiously sat down next to him on the other end.  He reached out for his shoulder.

"Alex," he whispered, his chest tight, heavy. "What happened?"

Hamilton didn't answer. He made a small, whimpering noise as he nuzzled his face into the pillow. He held his breath, feeling Laurens' hand on the back of his neck and running up through his hair.

"Alex, please talk to me."

Hamilton immediately sat up, feeling his voice crack against his will as he growled.  "Of course this isn't fine. Are you fucking stupid? Can't you _see_ me? I—I'm almost in fucking tears.” His breath hitched as he looked away.  Laurens' eyes widened.

"What's wrong? Was it something I did?" he asked with concern; hurt hinted in his tone though he tried to hide it.

"I don't know. I don't know," he repeated.  "When you said that I was a slut or whore or whatever I tried to block it out but then you wanted me to say it and I thought I was going to flip out and kill you, I don't know, it just made me so upset that I had to get away."

Laurens nodded slowly, his arms wrapping around Hamilton and pulling him closer. "Babe, I'm sorry... I didn't mean it. It was just dirty talk."

"Well, don't say shit like that," Hamilton muttered, leaning against Laurens’ chest and holding his hands. "Say nice things, make me actually wanna fucking come. Not shit that makes me feel bad."

"I'm sorry. I really didn't mean it," he whispered. After a moment he added, "I didn't know that you didn't like that stuff. ...Do we need a safe-word?"

"No. No, we don't. It's fine."

"Alexander."

"I said it's fine. Just don't call me your slut and I'm fine," he muttered indifferently. Laurens ran his fingers through Hamilton’s hair.

"I'm sorry," he repeated again. "Why does it bother you so much? I mean, not to be insensitive, it's fine that you don't like it, but obviously I don't think you're a slut or a whore, ‘cause you’re _not_ , just... why was it so...?"

Hamilton just shook his head, lips closed.

"...It's fine if you don't want to tell me, either. Maybe another time when we're not... y'know," Laurens mumbled against his cheek, pecking it slowly and laying down. Hamilton laid down next to him and found himself curling into his body.

"Sorry," he mumbled.

"Don't be."

"I should've let you finish, I don't know."

"Alexander."

"I can still get you off if you want.  It'll make this all less weird, and I feel bad.  It's not your fault I got upset."

" _Alex_ , it's fine. I'm not mad that I didn't get to come," Laurens chuckled softly at himself and nuzzled his face into Hamilton's neck, "I'm not mad that you don't like that kind of dirty talk, either. I mean, not everyone has the same kinks or whatever, and not even kinks but not everyone likes the same thing in bed. Like I remember early on I didn't like getting fucked but now I'm completely fine with it. Sorta. As long as it's you I'm fine, of course. I warmed up to it, y'know? ...Not that you have to come around and be fine with being called names, I'm not saying that. But my point is that you're not weird because you don't like something. And I love you regardless, of course, and I would never be mad at you for not liking something or not wanting to keep going or... whatever.  In all the time we've been together, it's never been _this_ kinky.  I mean, it's kinky, but I thought you'd like me being a little mean to you.  Usually you're responsive to stuff like that.  I only wanna make you feel good," he admitted, it was nothing but the truth; he continued to ramble, "You deserve everything.  I wanted to make you happy.  Sorry if I kind of fail at being vocal about it, though. I _do_ love you.  A lot.  If I ever made you feel like I didn’t, I—"

"If I tell you why it upset me, will you shut up?" Hamilton asked. Laurens' face turned pink and he looked away. Sighing, Hamilton flipped onto his side so he wasn't facing him. "Sorry if that sounded rude. I'm not mad at you, I just— I'm mad at myself for being so... ugh. Like that. I'm just upset because I heard people calling my mom a whore and a slut and other awful shit growing up, okay? That's it. I'm completely fine. It's not some big secret and I'm not traumatized, it just pissed me off. I'm not _her_."

"Hey," Laurens rolled onto his side as well, kissed his shoulder. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have just assumed that you'd be okay with it."

"Whatever. You couldn't have known, it's not like I—" Hamilton sighed and pulled the comforter up to his nose, closing his eyes. "My mom cheated on her first husband with my dad, and then my dad left when I was young— you know that, I told you that part— but even kids from school would make fun of me because they heard it from their parents that my mom was a slut. It's bothersome but I'm fine. It's not like I really even knew what the word meant until I was, like, eleven. I'm fine. And people call me ‘promiscuous’ or whatever the fuck they say, I don’t know. But it’s fine. I just didn’t like the fact that you, my _boyfriend_  of all people, would say something like that.  It makes me mad.  I don't know.  Angry; upset; hurt... I'm fine.”

Laurens breathed a sigh onto Hamilton's neck and kissed him. His arms wrapped more securely around Hamilton's waist under the covers. "The more you say you're fine," he whispered, "the less I believe you. And I’m sorry. I don’t want to lose your trust over something like this...”

"I just want to watch TV. Drink some coffee, hang out. Maybe try again later but I'm not feeling up to it right now."

"Okay, we can do that. Yeah. And, that's... okay. I'm sorry again. I love you. I don't ever want to hurt you— unless you want me to—"

Hamilton snorted and tried to stifle the chuckle. Laurens smiled against his neck and went on:

"—and I don't want to make you uncomfortable. If there's anything wrong the next time we have sex, just keep that in mind, that you can always tell me if you don't like it and I won't do it."

"I just... don't want it to happen ever again with anything at all.”

"Then I'll be better at asking, too, before I do anything that we haven't done or talked about. And about your mom... we can talk some other time, whenever you want to, right?" he asked. Hamilton nodded. Laurens sighed in relief, eyes still hot from the embarrassment of accidentally making his boyfriend cry. He felt a pit in his stomach anyway, truly not meaning to hurt him. Hamilton was usually so tough and liked rough sex so he didn't think twice before saying that shit to him. And now he felt awful. "I'm sorry again. I love you..."

"I love you too," he mumbled. "Let's find something to watch on your Netflix account. And, um... if you want to jack off in the bathroom or something now, I don’t care."

“Damnit, Alex, no.  I’m fine. I’m not even hard anymore. And I’d feel bad after... yeah.”

“Aw, you’re _sweet_. Come on, honey-bear, let’s watch a nature documentary.”

Laurens smiled and laughed under his breath. “Gross.”

“Gross to the documentary, or...?”

“To that _horrible_ pet name.”

“Then let’s watch a nature documentary, Dear.” 

“Jesus Christ, Alex...” He turned to Hamilton and kissed him briefly. “You’re a goddamn dork.”

"Sucks for you.  You're the one who wanted to date me.  And you like that nickname."

"Maybe when we're like, eighty."

He grinned.  "Eighty, been married for longer than we can keep track of.  Sitting outside on the porch.  We won't get two seperate rocking chairs, though.  We'll have one of those porch swings.  Damn, John, we'll be eighty, but I'll still be that annoying shithead that sits in your lap and kisses your saggy, wrinkly skin.  Shit," he could only laugh.

"You're getting ahead of yourself."

"Whatever.  It's a nice thought."  He looked away.

"You wanna grow old together?"

"No. Play a movie or something," he huffed.  Laurens smiled at his reddened cheeks, kissed him, and settled back down.

"I love you."


End file.
